About freedom of Thought: what if other people could hear all that we thought! what if thinking was like speaking...we would have no freedom...it's a blessing to be able to think and not say! to be able to imagine and not necessarily be known for doing so..blessing!

Gulon mein rang bhare baad-e-naubahaar chale
Chale bhi aao ke gulshan ka kaarobaar chale
Qafas udaas hai yaaro saba se kuchh to kaho
Kahin to bahr-e-Khuda aaj zikar-e-yaar chale
-Faiz Ahmed Faiz

Aaye Jazba-e Dil - Bhehzad Lucknavi

Aaye jazba-e dil gar main chahoon,
har cheez muqabil aa jae,
Manzil kay liay do gaam chaloon,
aur manzil saamnay aa jaey

Aaey dil ki khalish chal yoon hi sahi,
chalta to hoon uski mehfil main,
Us waqt mujhey chonka dayna,
jab rang main mehfil aa jaye.

Aaye raahbar-e kaamil chalnay ko,
taeyyar to hoon par yaad rahay,
Us waqt mujhay bhatka dayna,
jab saamnay manzil aa jaey.

Haan yaad mujhay tum kar layna,
awaz mujhay tum day layna.
Iss raah-e muhabbat main koey,
dar paish jo mushkil aa jaey.

Aaye jazba-e dil gar main chahoon,
har cheez muqabil aa jaey,
Aaye jazba-e dil gar main chahoon.

Inspiration

Yeh Muamla Koi Aur Hai, Najam Shiraz

na tera Khuda koi aur hai
na mera Khuda koi aur hai
yeh jo raaste hain juda juda
yeh mamla koi aur hai
kyoun nahin dekhta jahan mein
har she la bedud hai
jab uthi nigah to jhuk gayi
yeh mamla kuch aur hai

jise dhoondhta hai yahan wahan
dil mein tere maujood hai
jise mil gaya ek baar woh
usi dil mein asr-e-wajood hai

jo parhadiya insaan ko
rehman hai raheem hai
jab paas thi toh kitaab thi
parhaa diya toh Quran hai

phir ibaadaton ke hain silsile
phir kurbatoh ke daur hain

na tera Khuda koi aur hai
na mera Khuda koi aur hai
yeh jo raaste hain juda juda
yeh mamla koi aur hai

I drove to Uni todayyy!!! it was quite the achievement: entering the gates with the steering in my hands, quite unlike life at uni though! my grades are so not under my control, not even remotely! OMG quiz satus: 3,5,3,0.5?arghhh...out of 10!!! and 0 on 50...arghhh!
P.S. So not under control!

Rainy Night

It rains while my books await,
i know its january but feels like November rain
i can hear the gas burner and smell the orange peel
May i go to sleep now?
Ive had enough to eat!

Rainy Day

It rained today,only i missed it by...like 5 hours heh..neway it was a good morning..My best friend called from canada...I found her accent to be quite the funny...but she's quite the same. hmm also i went driving yesterday it was good fun. I drive well too..only i honk at the slightest sign of movement, let alone silly little kids with their miniscule bikes! ahha yea only i felt rather "miniscule" myself when a big brown army truck turned into my lane..i wanted to stop but y'know how it is with the brake plate getting lost under your feet..so i played brave and moved to the left on my Dad's persistent encouragement...ehhe..I dont want to sound too philosophical, especially with my uselessly huge words in this writing but its so parent-like to help children cast away their fears even though they are so in-your-face at that particular moment like the huge truck on the narrow little road..anyway it was a good day.no. it was a jolly good day and i had mighty good fun! kheke and now its time for peter pan to go study for the mid tomorrow

A Reluctant Dreamer

It's a pity i found you
a pity we both took notice
its not like we were meant to be,
not like we will ever be
But sometimes our laughter does bring hope
hope to you and me
You seem so far away sometimes
its hard to even see
that is when i feel so silly
silly enough to dream
dreams of wanting you by me
But i guess i still love what we have
the way we always meet
its always to do with what we've learnt
Irony does, but gleam
You ask me what the scene is,
and i can't seem to tell you just what it might be..

-7th of January 2006

A Skeptic Optimist

I dont know why it happened,
I do know that i prayed
but happiness as i know it now seems clearer than ever
yet i wonder: perhaps it was all a mistake
maybe it was just an illusion
what if i wake up to discover,that all that happened is now over
that all my dreams have packed and left
and then i think, why dream? why bother?
it's never real, its all a hoax
But i know its beauty, i know its warmth
i know im just too wise to know it...

8th of december 2005

Random Thoughts

In a hundred faces, I see you
See the glint in your eyes, and i know its only true
yet i keep myself aloof
for the hands that bar, reveal the madnes of it all
the thought that even i could choose

So let the heart swallow emotions and the mind follow decisions
and let us all lead pious lives as is ordained
I dont question the need for virtue, yet i question this deal in all
why should the heart beat,
when it needn't interfere with matters of the mind?

-wrote this sometime in october 2005

My Reverie

The days return and the mind wanders, once again
moments draw closer and the soul borders reality
it was this day, waited upon since the beginning of time
now time ticks away as i wave goodbye
to the dream that had led me here

the frost won't stay and the days won't wait
dreams must become reality before we part
or once again, the season will mock its way
through the hope of this day
where the rain was just right and the mist was all mine

quick one must act, before the curtain can seal tact into this play
soon the day will dawn, into a parting song
all hopes will reamain, under seven curtains and a veil

True this must go on,this silence till another dawn
till hope finds its way, struggling through hot days
the heart can then rule and turn them into jewels
of an ever lasting dream-indeed

on a rare occasion I might ask myself
what is this drive that makes us so happy, yet so sad?
its the love in this moment and the birth of a sonnet
that keeps us still living today

Inside Out-its good writing but a bit too harsh-i think

You need to change, you're not all that
seek to beleive you're better?
But in the end, it really doesnt matter
relationships don't work out this way
to degrade and deride all the way
people seek the best in you
while you bring out the worst there is
You really aren't the girl i thought i'd be

Memories so pleasant are made dull
seems to me its all to lull
heartless thing you are inside
so not worthy of being liked
people struggle day and night keep you up there
where its just right
but you seem to forget all there favours
look inside you, where your heart wavers

must you be so harsh and prudent?
must love be measured by yor hate-scale?
its really lonely once theyre gone
regret your folly while thyre still there
nothing will help once hearts are broken
nothing will return, once days turn over

a new sun will shine each day
darkening the shadows, the reminant decays
the harshness and tyranny may still be there
but no one to bother, neither to care

-wrote this on 8th of April 2003